The pain of beauty...

So, let's talk about how painful beauty can be at times.  I've spent years wondering why we, as women, have to endure pain to do all the things that make us feel beautiful.  

I mean, for one, what's up with eyebrow waxing?   Is it just me or does that just hurt like...well, you get the point!    Maybe my skin is extra sensitive or something, but when they pull that strip off, I almost cry....every single time. But, I'm particular about my brows and they tend to get a bit out of control, so I endure it. 

I've always wondered WHY anyone would put themselves through getting a wax in other places because eyebrow waxing is painful enough for me.  But, as I hit the big 4-0 last year and decided it was high time I did a boudoir photo shoot (because I'm not getting younger!), I decided that maybe I needed to get myself a bikini wax.  Terrified does not describe how I felt as I was getting ready for my appointment.   I had never met this person and she was going to be all up in my stuff.  The anxiousness of the pain was enough to make me want to run and hide.  Ya'll- I'm not even kidding!   I debated a shot of vodka or wine or something before hand, but with an 8:30 AM appointment, I decided I probably did not need to do that so early.

As I was getting ready, I texted two of my best girl friends to tell them I needed prayers. Yes, I asked for prayers about a bikini wax- that's how I roll.  My girls responded in the best way- with funny stories about their own experiences and advice, making the few minutes leading up to my appointment much easier and calming my nerves. My car was reading me the text messages as I drove to my appointment and I laughed hysterically at the way it read "just do the butt, it doesn't hurt."

Enter the esthetician, Emily, who immediately made me feel more relaxed about the whole thing.   I was the first appointment of the day, so as she got everything ready for the project at hand, we chatted and by the time I had to get on the table, I felt comfortable enough to bare it all.  I told her that I scheduled the bikini, but maybe I needed a brazilian- I mean, I've never done this and wasn't really sure.  (I knew the difference, but I really was terrified to think about how painful a brazillian would be.)   She said we would start with the bikini and then I could decide if I wanted to dive right into the world of brazilian.   

I closed my eyes as she did her thing down there and I just kept thinking, why am I torturing myself like this?   I mean, really- isn't natural in style right now?   And then she said, "are you ready?" and I said yes, even though in my head I was thinking how is anyone ever ready for something like this?  You are about to rip hundreds of hairs from my body using hot wax and cause the most intense pain I've ever felt in my life, so nope, I'm not ready, but I guess I have no choice now.  And then....she pulled the wax off and I may have finally took a breath for the first time in an hour or three.  It didn't hurt.  In fact, I thought there's no way that just pulled my hair out.   I just kept waiting for the intense pain I had imagined and it never came.   

It really didn't take that long before she handed me a mirror and told me I could take a peek and decide if I wanted to keep going.   Ok, no lie, the mirror part was the most awkward part of the appointment for me.   I'm not in the habit of looking down there like that, so it felt a little strange.    But, I took a peek and decided that I could endure a few more minutes and just go full fledge with it.  So, I said "Let's do the brazillian".   And that, my friends, is when my nerves really kicked into high gear because I was seriously thinking we are about to hit some of the most sensitive parts of my body with hot wax and then rip it off.   What the heck was I thinking??!!   So, as she put the wax on, I kept trying to stay calm, but I was literally terrified.  I mean, think monsters under the bed terrified....my nerves were shot all to heck.   She asked if I was ready and well, let's be real- at this point, there's no chance of getting out of this, so I managed to get a "yes" to come out of my mouth.     And..... I flinched, but not from pain.  I flinched because I anticipated that the pain would be unreal, but honestly, it was uncomfortable and that's it.  Eyebrow waxes hurt way worse!   Heck, cutting myself from shaving hurts worse than this.  

If you haven't laughed yet, then you are about to (just a heads up- I'm not leaving any details out).   She asked if I wanted to do the backside and I wanted to say no, but I decided well, let's just do it all.  My friends had already said it didn't hurt, so might as well just get it over with so I would know if I wanted to do it next time.   In my head, I'm thinking, how does this work.  Do I have to flip over on my stomach?   Do I need to throw my legs up in the air spread eagle? Is she going to ask me to get on all fours?  I honestly was freaking out over the position more than anything at this point.   I'm more flexible than I used to be, but I was just hoping she wasn't expecting me to get in some super weird position, because I wasn't sure I could.   But, she simply said, pull your knees up to your chest.  Whaaaat???  I'm freaking out over the position and that's it?   I just need to pull my knees up to my chest?!  And, just like that, the whole thing was over and I walked out of that room feeling a bit bolder and relieved that I didn't die during my first brazilian wax.  

Yes, I'm crazy and I overthink things, but I know there's alot of you that are just like me, so I wanted to share this experience.  Some would say I'm diving too deep into my personal life, but honest to goodness, someone has to write about this, right?   I mean, I wish I could have found a blog before my appointment that put me at ease.   

Last thing- my only advice would be if you haven't tried waxing, just do it!